Because in their point of view "being loved" means, a person who loves them should always be sensitive towards them, should not reject their views, never criticize or find defects and never try to bring them out of their comfort zones.
Expecting pamper means "Love me as I like".
Love nourishes and leads us to the welfare. But over pamper makes us weak.
Love makes us realize what we are, even though it hurts our ego. But pamper helps to strengthen our ego. Love always influence for the betterment.
Pamper show us even a wrong thing as a right one in the name of "acceptance".
But love is like a mirror. It clearly shows us as it is, not like we expect.
Pamper is just a mask. It is a trial to be good. Though sometimes it leads to certain misunderstandings, love gives us a meaningful and structured criticism.
Always being pampered makes them work in very low level, easy and comfortable place.
But love moulds them to take challenges and grow in life. Real love, even gets ready to sacrifice the relationship itself, but never fail or hesitate to guide them in a beneficial path. As no one can grow without changing. Great love always wakes us up from laziness and ignorance.
Love is like a meditation. It seems like nothing happens, but everything changes.
Photo credit: h.koppdelaney / Foter / CC BY-ND